The View from the Firehouse
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Wednesday, November 30, 2005My Wife and I
The past couple of nights I have had the most pleasurable experience in bed with my wife, before I tell what it was let me give you a little history on my wife and I.
We actually met thought a dating service, we dated for a couple of months and then I got deployed to the dessert for four months. While there Zena called me and told me she was pregnant, which to me was great news, I’ve always wanted to be a father.
Well the time came for her to have her first ultra sound, I called her or she called me, I don’t remember now but this is how the conversation went…
Me: So how’s the baby
Her: The babies are doing fine
Me: *long silence, than stuttering* bbbaabbbies
Her: we’re having twins
Her: hello any one there
After that I didn’t call her back for awhile, I was afraid there would be more good news.
So anyway, I get back from my TDY and we got an apartment together. But I wasn’t ready to be tied down, you know what I mean, I had more wild oats to sow.
Toward the end of Zena’s pregnancy the doctors put her on bed rest in the hospital. On the way home from visiting her I stopped in to my favorite bar and have a beer. Well one thing leads to another and I hook up with this lady that I don’t even know. Can you believe that my future wife is in the hospital, in pain, with my children and I’m shacking up with someone I don’t know!
Well that relationship went on for about a week and ended with me getting caught. Thankfully Zena forgave me for that. Sad thing is, back then if I thought I could get away with it, I probably would have did it again. That is how evil I was.
Ok, so let’s skip ahead a little. I get this new job, we move, from Anchorage to Valdez. Things aren’t going well; I’m working two weeks on, two weeks off, when I’m working its 12 hours at a time. Zena is home with twin boys, in a place were she knows no one. I didn’t know it at the time but Zena was in a deep depression, she wasn’t feeling like she was worth anything and I didn’t notice and sure wasn’t giving her the love she needed. We fought a lot, one memory that sticks out to me was a fight we had where I ended up sticking a kitchen knife thought an overhead cabinet. You see I have always had a violent temper, there just something in me that feeds of anger; it’s almost like a high.
My wife and I have been thought a lot of ups and downs, in the short time we’ve been together. For some unknown reason Zena has stuck by me. We got married when the boys where two. It’s been a total of 7 years since we’ve been dating; I think five years of that have been as man and wife. I can tell you thought that we are stronger now than we’ve ever been before. You see about three yrs ago I became a follower of Christ. It hasn’t always been easy, as a matter of fact it can get down right hard at times, but God has been faithful and the work that he has begun in me, while far from being complete, has changed me. I am not the self consumed person that I was all them years ago, don’t get me wrong I’m not perfect and I still struggle, sometimes I fall flat on may face. But the times I fall God is there to pick me up.
So what have my wife and I doing these past few nights that been so great, well for the first time we’ve been praying together. That may not sound like a big deal to you, but to me it’s the greatest thing. You see up until a couple of weeks ago, I would have told you that my wife was not a Christian, but I just don’t know anymore. I try to remember that growing in Christ can be a slow process; it sure has been for me.
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